Friends (and not the TV Show)

What the hell is a friend? Please explain to me what a friend is. Is it someone who posts on your wall that they are you "friend". Is it your local bartender, who talks with you and comforts you? One who pours you drinks and embraces your soul in exchange for tips? Is the "leach" who hangs onto your very word (although she hardly even remembers you name).

The people whom I consider friends are those who demonstrate that they year after year they are friends.

C and D are friends because, no matter what happens in their life, they take the time to say hello. No matter how difficult their life is, they call me. They make an effort to be a part of my life. I also make a point to be in their life. It is never one sided. Nor is it reciprocal. I expect nothing from them, nor do they expect anything from me.

I get everything from them, and they get everything from me. I have not seen C and D in about a year. And yet they are some of my closest friends.

M is also a person I can call a friend. She and her husband live upstate New York and I haven't been in her company since her sisters wedding in 1996. And yet when I am feeling down, she calls me and we talk. We text and stay together. I will always remember her as the one who insisted I go to my prom. She dragged me there and we had fun as friends. We are friends today.

The third person I consider a close friend is J. J and I grew up together. We talk on the phone all the time. She lives in Georgia now with her husband. She calls my mother to say hello to her and we talk. Her mother and I share a birthday.

There seems to be only two people who even remember that I have a birthday. J and K and that is only because we share a birthday.

It may not seem important to some, but the fact that at least somebody remembers that you lived, is important to me.

K is also a friend but I am not as close to her as I am with C, D, J or M.

Then there is H and J2. H's father is also a Marine and they are they best. Haven't talked to them since Christmas. Wow...need to call them.

Friends are those people who share their life with you. They don't just post on you Facebook page.  

Bad boys and Gentle Men

Today blog is about women. Women who are fickled. Unfortunately my experiences have shown me that women do not know what they want. Some women will claim to be friends. But I don't believe that they actually know what a friend is. This one young lady that I've been talking to thinks a friend is somebody she gives drinks to and charges them money for. I call that a bartender.

Other women I have had a chance to meet are more interested in dating "bad boys". They will never change "bad boys" into "gentle man". Many I hear have had to have restraining orders against these types of boyfriends. They don't learn, they don't change, they continue their ways and date the same men.

There are many men who are kind, gentle, and generous. Open your eyes to them. They are out there and they will care about you. These other guys are pumping themselves up with testosterone. All this testosterone will eventually come out as violence.

Men in general are loaded with testosterone, but these muscle brained "bad boys" thrive on testosterone. The quiet easy-going guys, the ones you pass by all the time, the gentle ones that you ignore. They try to stay healthy, they try to stay happy. They deserve more of your attention then you are willing to give. They will try harder to make you happy. They will try harder just because they know that they not the "bad boys".

Good friends are hard to find. When one comes along, open your life to him or her. Don't push them off forever, because they will be gone when you need them the most. He will have thrown them away and hurt them. They were moved on and you will have lost out one a friend.Today blog is about women. Women who are fickled. Unfortunately my experiences have shown me that women do not know what they want. Some women will claim to be friends. But I don't believe that they actually know what a friend is. This one young lady that I've been talking to thinks a friend is somebody she gives drinks to and charges them money for. I call that a bartender.

Other women I have had a chance to meet are more interested in dating "bad boys". They will never change "bad boys" into "gentle man". Many I hear have had to have restraining orders against these types of boyfriends. They don't learn, they don't change, they continue their ways and date the same men.

There are many men who are kind, gentle, and generous. Open your eyes to them. They are out there and they will care about you. These other guys are pumping themselves up with testosterone. All this testosterone will eventually come out as violence.

Men in general are loaded with testosterone, but these muscle brained "bad boys" thrive on testosterone. The quiet easy-going guys, the ones you pass by all the time, the gentle ones that you ignore. They try to stay healthy, they try to stay happy. They deserve more of your attention then you are willing to give. They will try harder to make you happy. They will try harder just because they know that they not the "bad boys".

Good friends are hard to find. When one comes along, open your life to him or her. Don't push them off forever, because they will be gone when you need them the most. He will have thrown them away and hurt them. They were moved on and you will have lost out one a friend.

Going to Carolina

 I listen to this couple next to me.  And in the background is the James Taylor song going to Carolina.  The woman wants to go and they probably should.

I hope they understand what a minister does.  I told them that I was a minister and that there is a difference between Christians and Jews.  Christians believe in Christ and Jews don't.

Still me....still forgotten

I really couldn't wait to write this post.  I am sitting at a local watering hole and watching.  Watching people treat other people, pretty poorly.  There is this one guy who has very visible emotional problems.  There are 2 guys and 1 woman who are mistreating this guy.  They know he is drunk, yet they sit there making fun of him.  I just watched as the bartender trying to restock the bar had 2 cases of bar in her hand trying to get past this other guy at the end of the bar and the guy wouldn't move.  He was too busy kissing the bartender from another bars ass.  There are 12 guys and 2 girls in the bar.  The girls are hanging with the bad BOYS and are wondering where the gentle MEN are.

Wake up people.  Especially you women. Bad boys will NEVER be gentlemen.  You can't train someone.  They are who they are. Don't ever think that you will marry someone and hope they change.

And to those who are mistreating the other drunk individual...well what goes around, comes around.  Someday, you mat be alone, or get into an accident and need assistance.  God is the only one who knows your fate.  Don't ever say, that will never happen to me, because it might.

Being Forgotten: Part II

today was the first day that these three girls from Ohio were home in 10 years. It again shows how we have become numb to our neighbors. We don't care about them, nor do we want to know who they are! We hide our heads in the sand and look the other way. We dare not learn about those who live around us.

Why have we become so insensitive to our fellow men?

It was only a month ago they spoke about the children that were left to fend for themselves after their mothers passed away. In the past month I have seen no change. We don't check on our neighbors, our friends, our associates. We don't do the Christian thing and look after each other. Many say we're Christians. I see it on Facebook although time how people proclaim they are Christians. I get postings about how we need to start a Christian revival.

Christ would be ashamed of most of you. Christ would never turn his back on anyone. If Christ saw you and you were hungry, he would feed you. If you were thirsty, he would quench your thirst. And if you needed comforting, he would comfort you.

I'm not saying you have to be like Christ, but I am saying that we need to get to know each other. Whoever sitting next to you right now turn to him or her and ask them "How you doing?" Get to know who they are. If you know somebody who lives by themselves invite them over for dinner.  Put down you iPhone and say hello.

Being Forgotten

In the past month, I have seen to news articles about children being found alone after their mother had passed away. These children were well under the age of children that could fend for themselves. The last one was still in diapers.

Why have we become a society that does look out for each other? Is it because we expect our government to take care of us? Is it because we become too busy in our lives to worry about other people's lives?  Is it because we spend so much time paying taxes that we just don't have the time for each other?

I see them my own life. Nobody takes the time to know each other anymore. my name is don't bother to say hello, waved to me, or ask me how I've been. If I haven't been out in public in several days nobody bothers to come and check on me.

I swear one day somebody is going to show up at my house because I missed an appointment or something like that, and they will find my body half eaten by the dog.

It is a sad, sad life that we have built for ourselves.

Eating at home

I grew up in Levittown.  A community on Long Island that might have been a "gated" community, if they had been invented in the 1940's.  Our life in Levittown was quite different than it is today.  Everyone knew each other. And as a child this meant that if you did something wrong during the day, your parents would know by dinner time.

Dinner time was something that today is considered a novelty.  We would all sit down when the male parent came home from work and eat TOGETHER.  If we went out to eat, which was a rarity, we went together as a FAMILY.  We would dress up to eat out.  It was not a suit and tie, but a nice clean shirt and pants that didn't have holes in them.

You went to church and wore your Sunday best.  You Sunday best were clothes that you reserved for Sunday ONLY.

My ohh my, how we as a civilization have fallen.  Let us start looking at civility again.  Let us start to revere our past in new ways.  Let us start to make connections again.

91111

We have come full circle and revisited September 11th's 11th Anniversary.  It was encouraging to see that it was less political than it was in years.  I was also encouraged to see some TV channels showing what these MONSTERS did to innocent people.

The first thing that I wanted to talk about was the name "Patriot Day".  I think it stinks.  I feel that it should be more like "Innocent Victims Day".  I think it should be something that NOBODY will change to a sale day.  Like Memorial Day or Veterans Days Sales, I see that some day in the future we will have Patriot Day Sales.

I was also very hurt to see the number of places throughout the area, that did NOT have their flags at half mass.  2977 people lost their lives that day.  There are many more who have been dead inside since.

Pearl Harbor was an attack against military bases and personnel.  911 was an attck against men, children, women and unborn children.  NEVER FORGET.

Why bother?

I am sitting here at a bar. I wanted to get dinner. I tried to introduce myself into a conversation but it turns out that like everything here in Sussex County New Jersey, if you didn't go to high school together you are an outsider.

Shades of Grey

I'm hearing about this book series called "Shades of Grey".  They are calling it Mommy Porn!!! What women need to understand is that they need to stop fantasizing about what they meant from men.  First they wanted "Real Men" then they wanted the "Metro sexual Male". 

Men aren't what you see of soap operas.  They aren't what you read in "Romance Novels".  They aren't what "Shades of Grey" portray them as.

Men are very simple creatures, they need only 3 things.  Sleep, food, and sex.  You have a 33.3% chance of getting right.  If they are awake, you have narrowed it down and now have a 50% chance of getting it right. (Of course there is one act that will be 100% correct.)  If a man is asleep, you can be 100% correct.  Leave him alone.

Women marry men to CHANGE them.  Stop that.  Women need to accept men for who they are and stop making them into what they want.  It won't happen and it won't make anyone happy.  Stop fantasy world and get into the real world.

Police and Abuse of Power

How many people out there have gotten a police written ticket?  If you haven't recieved a ticket, do you know of anyone who has gotten a police written ticket? I'll bet it is in the millions. Now how many of those tickets do you think were NOT fare? I'll bet that number is in the millions also.

Isn't it time that we all looked at this practice of ticketing people? My first complaint is that the Police, Town Attorney, and Judge of the ticket authority all work in the same building (I have yet to see this as an exception). Second complaint, is that I am paying each and everyone of those officials salary. Considering all this, is any ticket fare? Can an individual get a fail hearing in Municipal Court?

Where is Christmas? Where are those who profess to walk with God?

God has found me and guided me. I am far from perfect, but I try to act in Gods name. I don't steal, I don't cheat, I don't lie. I try my best to help my fellow man. Today, I am working on my ex-wifes car (even though I know that she speaks ill of me, all the time).  When I have extra food, or extra of anything, I give it away. I have very little of my own to begin with, but I give tons of stuff away.

I know that when my time comes, I will be rewarded. I know I will be taken care of by God. My problem is not with me! My problem is with my fellow man and what he/she are missing now.

I know people who go to church EVERY Sunday without fail. They will listen to the sermons and proclaim their love for Jesus Christ and for God. And the other 167 hours in the week they will lie, cheat, and do things to hurt their fellow man. If we all gave, then everyone could also receive. They would receive the warm and wonderful feeling that one gets from giving.

That is something you will never find under a Christmas Tree.  God Bless us, everyone.

Black and Blue Friday or Something Great?

• Walmart, Porter Ranch, Los Angeles, CA woman pepper sprayed fellow shoppers to snag an Xbox.
• Walmart, San Leandro, CA - Four gunmen demanded a man turn over his purchases. A fight broke out, one of the would-be robbers fired a gun, striking the man.
• Walmart, Rome, N.Y. – A fight broke out as the clock ticked midnight, leading to two injuries and one arrest.
• Walmart, Myrtle Beach, S.C. – Thieves hit a man on the head and shot a woman in the leg outside at 1 a.m.
• Walmart, Kissimmee, Fla. – A man was arrested after a fight at a jewelry counter.
• Buckeye, Az. – Grandfather shoplifting, smashes head on concrete floor.
• Walmart, Little Rock, Ar - Riot break out over $2 waffle makers.
• Target, Portland, Or - Cars being smashed to gain access to toys.

We have become so materialistic, people are more interested in the next iPad, xBox, Wii.  Whatever TOY is the newest and greatest. We have forgotten what the holidays are about.

Christ was born in a manger. His parents were not rich, as a mater of fact they were in Bethleham to pay taxes. They were not royalty.  Joseph was a carpenter and Mary was a housewife. A common working family. Yet this child who had very little in birth, made something great.

In the story of Hanukkah, the Maccabees retook a temple from the Syrian-Greek army. When they went to rededicate the temple and to purify it from being defiled by swine sacrafices, they found they only had enough oil to last 1 day and yet it burned for 8 days. These were rebels. They were not the highly trained Syrian-Greek army. They have very little. They did not even have enough oil. And yet they did something great.

We can be materialistic or we can do something great.  The choice is yours.  My kids had it all growing up and yet I don't think they understand.  I have friends of mine with so little, and I know thier children understand because even though the have so little, they have done so much, and they have given back.

This actually shows George Soros's hand taking a break from manipulating Obama.  Absolute proof that he IS the Puppet Master.

GM (Government Motors) and China

Our tax dollars at work. We bought and paid for GM. So how does our governement react? They send American Jobs and American Technology to China,

http://content.usatoday.com/communities/driveon/post/2011/09/gm-cuts-china-electric-car-deal----a-china-shakedown/1

"The Axis of Idiots"

A frind of mine emailed me this clip. I thought it needed to be repubished and shown to the world?

"The Axis of Idiots"
From the Podium: J. D. Pendry, Retired Sergeant Major, USMC

Jimmy Carter, you are the father of the Islamic Nazi movement. You threw the Shah under the bus, welcomed the Ayatollah home, and then lacked the spine to confront the terrorists when they took our embassy and our people hostage. You're the "runner-in-chief."

Bill Clinton, you played ring around the Lewinsky while the terrorists were at war with us. You got us into a fight with them in Somalia and then you ran from it. Your weak-willed responses to the USS Cole and the First Trade Center Bombing and Our Embassy Bombings emboldened the killers. Each time you failed to respond adequately, they grew bolder, until 9/11/2001.

John Kerry, dishonesty is your most prominent attribute. You lied about American Soldiers in Vietnam . Your military service, like your life, is morefiction than fact. You've accused our military of terrorizing women and children in Iraq . You called Iraq the wrong war, wrong place, wrong time, and the same words you used to describe Vietnam . You're a fake! You want to run from Iraq and abandon the Iraqis to murderers just as you did to the Vietnamese.. Iraq , like Vietnam , is another war that you were for, before you were against it.

John Murtha, you said our military was broken.. You said we can't win militarily in Iraq . You accused United States Marines of cold-blooded murder without proof and said we should redeploy to Okinawa . Okinawa, John? And the Democrats call you their military expert! Are you sure you didn't suffer a traumatic brain injury while you were off building your war hero resume? You're a sad, pitiable, corrupt, and washed up old fool. You're not a Marine, sir. You wouldn't amount to a good pimple on a real Marine's ass. You're a phony and a disgrace. Run away, John.

Dick Durbin, you accused our Soldiers at Guantanamo of being Nazis, tenders of Soviet style gulags and as bad as the regime of Pol Pot, who murdered two million of his own people after your party abandoned Southeast Asia to the Communists. Now you want to abandon the Iraqis to the same fate. History was not a good teacher for you, was it? Lord help us! See Dick run.

Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid, Carl Levine, Barbara Boxer, Diane Feinstein, Russ Feingold, Pat Leahy, Barack Obama, Chuck Schumer, the Hollywood Leftist morons, et al, ad nauseam: Every time you stand in front of television cameras and broadcast to the Islamic Nazis that we went to war because our President lied, that the war is wrong and our Soldiers are torturers, that we should leave Iraq, you give the Islamic butchers - the same ones that tortured and mutilated American Soldiers - cause to think that we'll run away again, and all they have to do is hang on a little longer. It is inevitable that we, the infidels, will have to defeat the Islamic jihadists. Better to do it now on their turf, than later on ours after they have gained both strength and momentum.

American news media, the New York Times particularly: Each time you publish stories about national defense secrets and our intelligence gathering methods, you become one united with the sub-human pieces of camel dung that torture and mutilate the bodies of American Soldiers. You can't strike up the courage to publish cartoons, but you can help Al Qaeda destroy my country. Actually, you are more dangerous to us than Al Qaeda is. Think about that each time you face Mecca to admire your Pulitzer..

You are America's 'AXIS OF IDIOTS.' Your Collective Stupidity will destroy us. Self-serving politics and terrorist-abetting news scoops are more important to you than our national security or the lives of innocent civilians and Soldiers. It bothers you that defending ourselves gets in the way of your elitist sport of politics and your ignorant editorializing. There is as much blood on your hands as is on the hands of murdering terrorists. Don't ever doubt that. Your frolics will only serve to extend this war as they extended Vietnam . If you want our Soldiers home as you claim, knock off the crap and try supporting your country ahead of supporting your silly political aims and aiding our enemies..

Yes, I'm questioning your patriotism. Your loyalty ends with self. I'm also questioning why you're stealing air that decent Americans could be breathing. You don't deserve the protection of our men and women in uniform. You need to run away from this war, this country. Leave the war to the people who have the will to see it through and the country to people who are willing to defend it.

Our country has two enemies: Those who want to destroy us from the outside and those who attempt it from within.

Semper Fi, J. D. Pendry - Sergeant Major, USMC, Retired

Dyslimbia vs. Borderline Personality Disorder

I was doing some surfing on the web and came across this site dealing with Borderline Personality Disorder. http://www.biologicalunhappiness.com/bpd.htm?src=overture

The very 1st title on that page was "A POSSIBLE NEW NAME FOR BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER". Below is the article which I found fasinating.

Many people would like to change the terminology of the “borderline personality disorder” to a new term that more accurately describes the illness. The term “BPD” in and of itself is as if the whole person (and the personality) is flawed, rather than looking at the BPD as a medical problem it actually is.

The term “borderline personality disorder” implies that there is no hope for treatment as many mental health professionals unfortunately still believe. There is thought that this illness borders on schizophrenia, thus the term “borderline.”

What then is borderline personality disorder? These questions have been posed to Dr. Leland Heller, expert in treating borderline personality disorder.

Q. What do you think about the term "borderline personality disorder"?
A. “I think it's a horrible, insulting label for a real medical illness. The name alone reduces serious research, stigmatizes victims, and implies the person is crazy. It denies the medical nature of the process, and implies simply a personality problem.”

Q. Do you think “borderline personality disorder” is an accurate description?
A. “No I don't. It implies a character problem. While I've encountered many people with a bad character who had the BPD, most borderlines I've treated (over 2100) do not have character problems. "Borderline" means patients live "at the border" between psychosis and reality. When borderlines are well treated medically, psychotic experiences are few and far between - and can be treated well. Borderlines don't live at that border, they simply go into psychosis too easily under stress.”

Q. What is the BPD?
A. “The BPD is a medical problem, likely a form of epilepsy (brain cells firing inappropriately and out of control). The characteristic symptoms include inappropriate moodiness, chronic anger, emptiness, boredom, dysphoria (anxiety, rage, depression and despair) and psychosis. The other criteria are symptoms related to these medical problems.
ALL neurological disorders can have an effect on the personality, such as Parkinson's disease which isn't called the ‘shaking personality disorder.’ "

Q. What does this term "Dyslimbia" mean?
“ ‘Dys’ means malfunction, and limbia meaning from the limbic system.
‘Dyslimbia’ is malfunction of the limbic system. While other neuropsychiatric disorders involve malfunction of the limbic system, the limbic system dysfunction is profound in the BPD. I chose Dyslimbia for my patients to take the stigma away. The BPD needs a new name, one that emphasizes healing not labeling.

I don’t care if it’s renamed ‘Dyslimbia’ or not, but a more honest, humane, and hopeful name needs to be made for this illness. Patients deserve to get medical attention for ‘Dyslimbia’ (or an equivalent name), rather than have doctors and therapists shun them because they are ‘borderlines.’”

Mental Illness Awareness Week

I wish we would get a heads up on things like "Mental Health Awareness Week". I wasn't even aware that there was a "Mental Health Awareness Week", let alone that it was this week.

Anyway. Check out the link.

Mental Illness Awareness Week focuses on changes TheCabin.net

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Leaving on a jet plane, don'tknow when I will be back again...

I'm not doing well.  My wife signed a lease on an apartment.  The kids have decided that they are going to live with her.  Hence the abandonment issues.  My wife knows this will hurt me.  My kids know this will hurt me.

My daughter thinks that because I told her to go outside when she was little, that I didn't want her.  I don't know how to fix warped perceptions like that.  I love my kids so much it hurts.  It hurts when they do things like this.  It hurts when they won't get help.  It hurts when they don't care enough to learn about me.  I haven't cried like this in a long time.

I can't help but to think that I have lost them for good.

The Monster in the Box

I was going through some of my old posts on MySpace to make sure some of thereally good ones would make it on Blogger.com.  I saw this and posted it.

It's been years since I've written a peom, but this one was rattling through my head and wouldn't let me sleep.  I pulled out one of my cassette recorders (that's one of those things that came long before CD's or MP3's) put it along side of my bed, and as the words came flowing I recorded them.  This is the result.

The Monster in the Box

I colored my world,

in shades of grey.

But the Monster in the Box,

came out to play.

 

I tossed and I turned,

and I tried to sleep.

But the Monster in the Box,

was cutting to deep.

 

I wanted to speak,

to talk, say a word.

But the Monster in the Box

was the one that was heard.

 

I've been wounded so deep,

and fallen so low.

Because the Monster in the Box,

is a formidible foe.